Stylist Adventure with a twist

i treasure

i have a lot to be thankful for to the big guy up there, or, wait, I'm a Buddhist, so yeah, i thank all the deities to have given me all of the following:

1. my friends who've i've met in SIM and all my friends who are currently in my life
2. my family who has been patient, forgiving and has a never giving up on me attitude
3. brook, who is whom i want to be with for the rest of my life

yes, sometimes when things get fuzzy, it's not clear that we should stop a while and look at where we are, to think of the good and cherish all that we have. I'm doing exactly that. I want to think though how lucky i am to have come to this day, to reach whichever maturity level that i'm currently in, (yeah sounds weird but well, i know i can be more mature than now) cos i believe, every single thing, that happen to us, even down to the tiny detail means something. it's like a multiplier effect, something happen to me, something else different happen to someone else, you know, that kinda thing.

so yes, i strongly believe, that every single thing, good or bad, has shaped me into who i am today. i want to be more of a focused person, have a goal in mind and work through it cos then, i will be satisfied, then i can say "mission.... accomplished", with a smile of cos. =)

it's been a hell of a week or 2 for me, i don't seem to take stress very well, been sleeping at around 5-6am, latest, 8-9am cos of studying, and waking up at 11-12pm, to start again. though, if i had been a great student from the start, i might have had graduated long time ago, but then, i would never have met the people i've known today.

it might sound wrong but i'm grateful i was playful last time. now don't judge me yet, i do get upset with myself for letting my parents down, but i would never have been able to engage more so, be more open for discussions and not having an air of, "oh i'm older than you so i'm smarter in every way" kinda attitude. i've realised the difference lie in the attitude where some people think that being older means "you give me respect, so do as i say, and i'm always right".

no, i dislike that kinda mentality and i'm glad, i went to RP and not any other polys cos that's when all the interaction came in, all the building of confident, the understanding of my strength, the focus i gained. now it's a whole new ball game and i'm taking up the challenge, no, it's not easy, then again, if it's too easy everyone will be able to do it to eh?

so yes, i thank you, to whoever oversee through the nurturing process of me and stood by me, and giving me advises, and last but not least, thank you baby, for going through exam stress with me all over again even though yours was long over, i understand teaching me is, prolly the toughest job u can ever undertake, and prolly is the meanest thing u can do for me, but thank you darling for staying up till 4-5am just repeating your sentences, and having ur blood boil cos i'm simply dumb in math and stats and having nightmare that i said i didn't know how to do a single exam question after my paper, i promise
















there's more teaching to come. (i know, i know, there's a possibility you might strangle me this time, not simply shafting up your fingers into my nostrils)

loves,

posted by Melanista @ Wednesday, May 14, 2008